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The exquisite shame of wearing clamps with chains has left me and now all I remember is the pleasure. I can see my own sly surrenders and men who smiled at the conquests, all lived out on my pale skin. Each freckle is a reminder of a kiss, my back an unwelcome testament to the slow ecstasy of my true love's tongue, trailing up my spine towards my craning neck. I recall his slow delight in licking me there, because I had asked him to. It was weird. But I wanted him to so much so that he loved doing it, weird as it was.I've tried to 'take care of it' - why do we still call masturbation 'taking care of it?'I take care of it quite often,(even now as I type) My lust is not an unruly pet or a household task to be completed. My synapses and my nerves crackle, I need, I need, I so desperately need to be fucked and it feels almost limbic. Maybe it is. I still find myself restless in my local sex store, while a woman who I might not have been attracted to in other circumstances, finds me. Heck you might even enjoy it! You might learn something.” With that I walked out of the bedroom to sleep on the sofa. We didn’t speak again until the morning. The next morning we silently and tensely ate breakfast at the table. He kept glaring at me over the top of his newspaper before he finally put it down and said”about last night” “What about it?” I replied. “Did you mean what you said? About finding another man? About letting me watch?” I could feel my pussy start to stir. Could I believe my ears? Was he really asking me these things? “Possibly.” I said. “I love you honey but my god I am frustrated. I know you work so hard for all of us. I know that something has to give and you’re tired all the time but I have needs. Lustful needs. I want them to be fulfilled. And every two months, if that, in the missionary position is not cutting it. I’m sorry. I just thought if I had a fuck buddy that could take care of me when I needed it, I wouldn’t be so wound up all the time. I would be.
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